When Being Alone Turns Into Loneliness, There Are Ways to Fight Back
Occasional Loneliness Is a Near-Universal Feeling, Therapists Say, That Individuals Can Identify and Work to Change
ELIZABETH BERNSTEIN
Nov. 4, 2013 6:57 p.m. ET
I spend a fair amount of time by myself. One recent day, I worked, read, cleaned my desk, took a walk, made soup and chatted with my best friend on the phone. By evening, I felt productive and content. Then, for the first time in hours, I checked my phone. There was not one new text, call or email—not even from Groupon. Wasn’t anyone thinking of me? It got me thinking: How does being alone turn into being lonely? Some people crave time alone, but experts say occasional feelings of loneliness are a near-universal experience. Evolutionary psychologists say the lonely feeling developed to alert humans—social animals who rely on each other to survive—that they were too close to the perimeter of the group and at risk of becoming prey. Spending time alone is more fun when it is by choice. When it is the result of loss, separation or isolation, people are likely to experience it as loneliness. Homesickness, bullying, empty-nesting, bereavement and unrequited love are all variations on the theme. Loneliness isn’t depression, which is a lasting feeling of deep sadness and hopelessness and should be treated by a professional. Read more of this post
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